A Random Entry

My thoughts are pretty jumbled up right now. Things and situations that I had always thought will never happened to me but to others actually happened to me. Well, there's only one situation right now, but I'm feeling quite desolate right now. Helpless, scared, guilty, sinful.

I can't help but worry about what's gonna happen, etc. It sure doesn't help that while I'm thinking and worrying about all these, I have to bear the consequences of it. Why do women have to suffer because of men's laziness? I know I'm not suppose to worry and think about it too much but I can't help it. Even though I can't do anything about it right now, or even solved the problem right now, I just can't help it.

Thank goodness I have a friend who's really there for me. She's someone who I can open up to. I can't tell my best friends or other close friends because I know they would not understand. They would have thought that I was at fault. Come to think of it, I guess I'm partly to be blame. If I was more insistent, more firm in my choice, I wouldn't have to face such dilemma right now. *sigh*